Some days it just seems more appropriate to tell you a story of my life then to write a disciplined piece or informational article. Some days it feels like I am living out what advice I offer to others. That’s because we are all prone to these behaviors. It is how you learn to process them or transform them that matters.
This morning, after having worked almost 40 hours straight and looking forward to a cup of coffee in a quiet house, I walked into the kitchen to find dirty dishes in the sink, on the counter and on the stove. Which meant getting water for my coffee pot would come after I loaded the dishwasher. For some of you this would be alright. For others your mind might have gone where mine did. “UGH!”
The above thought is common. It reflects a natural let down or sense of frustration. We all have these moments. What tried to edge its way into my mind next … well it’s a different kind of story. “Wow, well I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I am the only one who can do the dishes. I am the only one who really cares what our house looks like. No one ever thinks of me! Guess that shows how much they care about me or love me.” While these thoughts are also common, they are not healthy. And if they are verbalized, they not only can be devasting they can be damaging to the intended target. On the same note, if they enter our thoughts and are believed, they also have the same effect on us. These types of “lies” impact us mentally. That’s not all. They damage our emotional, spiritual, and physical being.
Dr. Terry Wardle proposes that when these voices reach a certain decibel in our minds, they impact the way we heal. Psychologist, Dr. Chris Thurman, calls these voices the lies and suggests that when we believe them, they hinder us from healthy living. Leading secular psychiatrist, Daniel Siegel, M.D., explains the way the brain uses information stored within it from experiences we live. All of them, recognize that these voices that we utter to ourselves keep us from living as we are intended.
Imagine that if these simple statements have such power on your whole body, what the rest of your self-talk might be doing! None of us are exempt from this type of thinking. It comes from the way we have processed, stored, and learned to respond to external forces. The great news is that these negative patterns can be transformed. This is what I am talking about when I say to you that you can be refreshed, renewed, and restored!
Monica Swank 