Faith, hope, love. These are words thrown around regularly in Christian circles. I can also argue that they are used as frequently in other faith traditions as well. Why? Because they are words that are meant to soothe the soul. Words that offer a future. In some way these three words are supposed to guarantee that there is a better end to what has begun in each of us as individuals.
They are not empty words. No, far from it, they are filled with sustenance. They are used to reflect something greater. There are two problems that I see straight away. The first is that we often use these words as stand-alone words. That is not their intent. Consider that when these words first found roots in Christian history, they had long been used in Jewish tradition.
Faith represented what Abraham had when he left his family and journeyed into foreign soil. Faith is also what he held as he trusted God would provide for him in his darkest moments. Faith is not just a belief in something, it is a deep-rooted trust that extends from one person to another or in the case of Abraham to God. Faith also is a lifestyle. It is not just some system of beliefs. It is how life is lived for most of us. We have faith in so many things that they are far too great to count.
It is no different for the word hope. I think however there is a strength in hope that far exceeds faith. I have watched as patients in hospitals lose hope of ever getting better. It is not uncommon for them not to in these situations. Hope is also what I have witnessed as people take terminal illnesses on and win. I am not suggesting it is a cure. Rather it is small glimmer of believing in the good that drives individuals on, sometimes one horrific step at a time.
Love aligns with the other two words. It changes the soiled sheets of a parent; it looks beyond the disfigured face or body of a loved one. Love is more powerful than any human strength. It is blind to the physical because its existence is meshed within the intricate system of the psychological.
But what if you speak these words to someone who does not know them? This is where my other problem with these words occurs. What if the recipient of these words has been hated the entirety of their lives? What if they have known nothing but mountains of dead laying in their neighborhoods, of fighter jets speeding low across the horizon. What if their life began in a crack house and they have been traded day in and day out sexually so that they could afford a loaf of bread?
What if these words are not in your vocabulary, but you are somewhere in between? Perhaps you have been tossed around from parent to parent in an ugly divorce. Maybe you have spent most of your life in unloving, harsh homes. Or maybe you haven’t been in any of these places, and you are taken aback by my words here.
You cannot be aware of all things at all times, especially untold secrets of others. Nor can you disregard who you are and who you’ve been raised to be. I do not buy into words like ‘unity, acceptance,’ and others. Why because we cannot ever fully know who each other is at the root. When we use these words to express brotherly love or concern, we must also be able to use the other words, faith, hope, and love. And if each of these words look different for our fellow humans then we are going to miss the mark by a mile.
So, where are you in these descriptors? Do you subscribe to them because you can relate to them or do they seem distant, unattainable in this lifetime? If these words help to define your lifestyle, then do me a favor. Head over to my resource page at www.monicaswank.org, click on the ‘growth’ tab and listen intently to what is shared. If you have not ever or are not currently experiencing these words in your life there are multiple resources at the website for you, but I have one other thing I want to leave for you here today.
- If faith is a trust in something/someone else, begin by
- Listing what your ‘thing’ is.
- Now, take it a step further, list all of the good qualities of that thing and all of the bad.
- When you mimic the good or bad what is the result? Are there negative consequences or positive results?
- If hope is a glimmer of good for the future, begin by
- Listing what your hope is in or if you don’t have hope why not (what does it look like – give it a description)?
- When you allow yourself to hope, do things go differently, better or worse?
- If you listed hope in a person or thing, if that usually does not work out, what else might you put your hope in? List some options.
- If love is not based on a good or bad, but on an emotion begin by
- List what things receive your love. One to ten (or beyond) list them with one being that which receives the greatest amount of your love.
- Next to each item list yes if you receive love back, no if not. Then list do you expect or wish to receive love back next to each item.
- Here are qualities of love: patience, kind, not jealous, not rude or arrogant, not selfish, not irritable or resentful, doesn’t enjoy others suffering, is honest. Circle those items on your list that fit these descriptions.
Recognizing where these things fit into our lives is only a step. Our answers do not mean we are living a good life or a bad one. Nor do they mean we are bad or good individuals if we lack anything in these areas. It is simply an assessment, just like when you make a list of what grocery items to get at the store. No, I am not making light. This is simply an exercise. The next step is up to you. If you see some areas that you think you might want to improve on you have resources. Visit my home page on my website, go to the bottom and click on the contact tab. Send me a short message and I will respond in a day or two. You are not alone – there is a world of individuals out there waiting to love on you.
As always thanks for letting me take this journey with you – blessings my friend.
Monica Swank 