Sit, Stay, Come

I have never trained a dog. If you listen to my podcasts, you know that I have one. I was very lucky though. When we got our little dog, he had already learned basic commands. What he wasn’t good at or struggled with he learned through my kids, and my father-in-law who has a natural talent for working with animals. When I started on the topic for today, obedience versus power, I instantly got stuck on this idea of obeying which led to dogs.

We crave success and power over a multitude of things, but what we should be seeking is to obey God. I don’t know about you, but the word obey is a sticking point for me. When I was younger, obeying ran counter to many of my actions. So, when it came up, I really felt the need to bulk because it was a little reminiscent of training dogs. Sit, stay, come, heel! They all project this image of robotic obedience. They also shout, power. For the animal to respond there has to be this sense of control or power exercised over them.

Once again, I feel myself resisting this idea. Does God really have power over us? And if he does, which one of us willingly desires to lay down their own sense of power to become subservient? Well yes, God is more powerful, and he executes it over us for our own good. I am not going to get into this topic, but reread the Garden of Eden, the Exodus story, Jonah’s experience, and on and on.

Laying down our power to obey is not necessarily easy, but it is healthiest. In John 14.21, we are told that obeying means loving first. When you are spending energy seeking his way first, you are also encountering joy, real joy. Think about your deepest relationships that involve love. We do not typically give of ourselves because we are being obedient, but this idea of giving when reciprocated strengthens these relationships. This is only one small portion of what happens when we obey God. Love does develop, a sense of respect grows, but this is not all that God intended when he said to obey his commands.

Moses received the laws of God, thousands of years ago. Their purpose was to make the people unique among the nations, to remember and honor what God had done for them, but they were also for some very basic life processes. In living according to the ways God desired, humans set themselves up for health and wellness. Repeatedly in scripture we are told that if we obey it will go well. The laws were designed to protect the people from harm, both evil intent and natural disease. While this is not the only role for them in human lives, God set up order so that life would be good for humans (that was the original intent in the Garden).

Sometimes, I think we make the scriptures harder than they are to interpret. God designed human life to be good and he is continually attempting to make that happen for us, we are the ones who alter it. When you obey, you will find joy. Inner joy that does not falter when life hits hard. I am not saying you will be free of sadness, or pain, but you will have peace as you go through those times. I’m even going to make this easy for you. There are two commandments that encompass all the others: Love God with all your heart, soul, strength, and mind, and love your neighbor as yourself (Luke 10.27). When you truly love like this, it becomes a natural response to obedience, and ultimately offers you health through peace-filled living.

Pondering a Strange Picture

I heard a song yesterday that left me pondering. That’s not a word we hear much in the western world today. We typically use the term “think” or “think about” when we are talking about some event that gives us pause. But ponder provokes an image of the famous thinker statue. This idea of deep thought in which we might find our pose altered as our eyes drift into a trance and we lean in to really consider the thing.

My teenage son was randomly picking songs and playing them in the car yesterday, so I couldn’t tell you the name of the one song that struck me. In all honesty, I couldn’t tell you many of the words. It was just that at the time the words imprinted this image in my mind of God and a connection to Covid. Well sorta. Let me explain.

The song mentioned seeing someone special from behind glass. It talked about the pain of this separation. It suggested a lack of the use of natural human processes. The greatest one being touch. It was this idea of desiring someone so deeply, their close presence sensed, but this deep chasm of space keeping the two from becoming one. The inability to touch the ones we love is not only felt in the physical realm, but it also creates an ache within the emotional and spiritual places of our lives. It is a below the surface feeling that goes deep into the heart of us. The ache that comes from that denial is intense.

I think it is also unnatural. We are designed to be communal. We are designed to need one another’s touch, their conversation, their acceptance. When it is missing, we live counter to all of our physical, emotional, and spiritual design. Life feels disconnected. Life has this sense of being off center. Living this way for too long takes its toll on our well-being.

So how do we rectify that in a time where the entire world is living this way? We are left with no choice but to fix it or to suffer its negative consequences. Consider all of these areas: touch, feeling, and spirit. In what ways can you do small things to fill these places so that they are not left unattended? A smile given or received from a stranger, the touch on a shoulder or a full-blown hug, maybe a deep conversation. We cannot continue to disregard these things. They give us life and connection.

How does God fit into this story? Close your eyes and picture God looking down at us from his throne. Do you think he feels the same type of pain as us knowing that he loves us so greatly and we are often just outside of his reach? Does his heart ache like ours at the realization we avoid conversation with him? Or does he feel deep rejection at knowing we don’t accept him into our lives? I think these questions deserve a deep, reflective time of pondering.

  • Blessings my friend

The Lies We Believe

Some days it just seems more appropriate to tell you a story of my life then to write a disciplined piece or informational article. Some days it feels like I am living out what advice I offer to others. That’s because we are all prone to these behaviors. It is how you learn to process them or transform them that matters.  

This morning, after having worked almost 40 hours straight and looking forward to a cup of coffee in a quiet house, I walked into the kitchen to find dirty dishes in the sink, on the counter and on the stove. Which meant getting water for my coffee pot would come after I loaded the dishwasher. For some of you this would be alright. For others your mind might have gone where mine did. “UGH!”

The above thought is common. It reflects a natural let down or sense of frustration. We all have these moments. What tried to edge its way into my mind next … well it’s a different kind of story. “Wow, well I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I am the only one who can do the dishes. I am the only one who really cares what our house looks like. No one ever thinks of me! Guess that shows how much they care about me or love me.” While these thoughts are also common, they are not healthy. And if they are verbalized, they not only can be devasting they can be damaging to the intended target. On the same note, if they enter our thoughts and are believed, they also have the same effect on us. These types of “lies” impact us mentally. That’s not all. They damage our emotional, spiritual, and physical being.

Dr. Terry Wardle proposes that when these voices reach a certain decibel in our minds, they impact the way we heal. Psychologist, Dr. Chris Thurman, calls these voices the lies and suggests that when we believe them, they hinder us from healthy living. Leading secular psychiatrist, Daniel Siegel, M.D., explains the way the brain uses information stored within it from experiences we live. All of them, recognize that these voices that we utter to ourselves keep us from living as we are intended.

Imagine that if these simple statements have such power on your whole body, what the rest of your self-talk might be doing! None of us are exempt from this type of thinking. It comes from the way we have processed, stored, and learned to respond to external forces. The great news is that these negative patterns can be transformed. This is what I am talking about when I say to you that you can be refreshed, renewed, and restored!

Stepping Stones

Years ago, I wrote in my first book, True Dependence, that life feels a lot like walking across a creek on stepping stones. I come back to this idea time and again. We get ourselves talked into that first step, finally take it and what happens – it shifts in the sand underneath soaking our feet!

Here you are just peeking in on my blog with some of that same trepidation or hesitancy. I am going to make a promise right from the start – you if stick with me on this journey, you are most DEFINITELY going to get your feet wet.

Sorry, I’m guessing you wanted something more reassuring than that, but if we’re both honest there is just no way to walk through life without experiencing some bumps. Some of those are going to bruise us pretty seriously. So your feet are going to get wet if you decide to work on living a more fulfilling life. Other truths occur when you start across the water on those slippery, slimy stones. You will experience beauty and if you stick with it, whether your feet get a thorough soaking or not there is ALWAYS, yes always a bank on the other side.

Have you ever seen a one-sided waterway? Even if we cannot see the other side of the massive expanse of a sea or ocean there is a comfort in knowing that it exists. The practice of reshaping your thoughts into healthier more peace-filled thoughts is just that, practice. It takes time to recognize the untruths we tell ourselves, reorganize our thoughts and then live into the truth. The Bible calls this renewing. In fact, Paul writes that after we go through this process we will be able to test and know what God’s will is (Romans 12.2).

The first stepping stone has the word, “truth,” written on it. The ink cannot be changed. It does not fade. Neither will the stone ever move allowing another to replace it. In order to take the rest of the steps across the water each of us must first be truthful with ourselves. This is challenging and I suggest it requires the help of someone to walk hand in hand with you. Until you find that partner, begin by carrying around a pad of post it notes. When you make a mistake, write down what you did, how you felt, and how you reacted both emotionally and physically. Keep track of these and at the end of the week spend some time in prayer asking God to help you see the truth behind the mistake, your emotions, and your actions.

It’s just the first stepping stone, but you can do it! – Monica

Welcome

My name is Monica Swank and this is my story. I hope that we will become fast friends.

You are probably thinking to yourself, “so what.” There are hundreds, no more like thousands of people who start blogging. Many of those individuals stick with it while others slowly start to drift off. So what makes me different (or at least think I am) and what is my story all about?

  • This page is not just an idea for me, it’s my work.
  • I am putting these pages/blogs together because I am passionate about giving others what I have received.

I obtained my M.Div. with several focuses. The first, is in Chaplaincy, the other was a course of study that was and is my passion – learning how to care for those in trauma or crisis. As a hospital Chaplain, I work with all types of individuals. From those experiencing intense trauma to those at a loss for understanding what spirituality means.

The reason I am led to this type of work is that I have experienced personal transformation through my own faith in Jesus. And over 13 years of experience working in crisis as an Emergency Medical Dispatcher, a Fire Chaplain, a Director of a Pregnancy Center, and a member of a state-wide committee dedicated to the care of First Responders, I have watched people in their constant struggle to find peace.

Using that knowledge, I applied it to my speaking, writing, and spiritual coaching so that those at all degrees of spirituality could experience rest in their lives. So if you

  • are looking for some encouragement,
  • personally have or know someone who is suffering through crisis (or hasn’t healed),
  • or desires to deepen your faith in God,

then you have come to the right place. I hope to take this journey called life, with you offering the resources and skills you need to not only traverse the rough spots, but find a tranquil place. So whether you are just an active reader, you desire personal coaching, or need a speaker at your next event you have found a great starting point.

Thank you for allowing me the chance to journey with you – Monica